Asked forgiveness reacting in a negative way

I find my self asking for forgiveness. I have all as God to forgive me. I was blind sided by a situation and I did not handle it right. I was in tears. It is so hard to admit when you are wrong even though the other person might have done something really mean. One of my daughter tried to help me not to get angry but my flesh said otherwise. An so here I am apologizing. I was so hurt and angry I could see straight. Even though I have excepted Christ as my personal savior I have a lot to work on Paul said it well. I have a little bit of it from Romans 7 verses 15 through 25


15For I do not understand my own actions [I am baffled, bewildered]. I do not practice or accomplish what I wish, but I do the very thing that I loathe [[b]which my moral instinct condemns].

16Now if I do [habitually] what is contrary to my desire, [that means that] I acknowledge and agree that the Law is good (morally excellent) and that I take sides with it.

17However, it is no longer I who do the deed, but the sin [principle] which is at home in me and has possession of me.

18For I know that nothing good dwells within me, that is, in my flesh. I can will what is right, but I cannot perform it. [I have the intention and urge to do what is right, but no power to carry it out.]

19For I fail to practice the good deeds I desire to do, but the evil deeds that I do not desire to do are what I am [ever] doing.

20Now if I do what I do not desire to do, it is no longer I doing it [it is not myself that acts], but the sin [principle] which dwells within me [[c]fixed and operating in my soul].

21So I find it to be a law (rule of action of my being) that when I want to do what is right and good, evil is ever present with me and I am subject to its insistent demands.

22For I endorse and delight in the Law of God in my inmost self [with my new nature].(D)

23But I discern in my bodily members [[d]in the sensitive appetites and wills of the flesh] a different law (rule of action) at war against the law of my mind (my reason) and making me a prisoner to the law of sin that dwells in my bodily organs [[e]in the sensitive appetites and wills of the flesh].

24O unhappy and pitiable and wretched man that I am! Who will release and deliver me from [the shackles of] this body of death?

25O thank God! [He will!] through Jesus Christ (the Anointed One) our Lord! So then indeed I, of myself with the mind and heart, serve the Law of God, but with the flesh the law of sin.

I was shocked at myself and confused as to why I reacted the way I did. I didn't see me. Everyday you have to ask God to search your heart because we do not know what is in there. Today I am meditating on Psalm 51